Well this weekend is Fathers Day. Such a bittersweet day for me. I love celebrating and honoring the fact that Jason is such a wonderful engaged dad to my kids. But the day also brings me so much sadness.
No card or gift to buy for my dad. No calling my dad and wishing him happy fathers day. No cookouts with my mom and dad to celebrate what a great dad he is. I can't give him any hugs and words of appreciation. Now all I can do is quietly remember him in my own mind. I hope and pray that he feels my love and appreciation - although we are seperated by life and death.
I try to remember my dad as the strong and amazing man that he was. But sometimes the visions of him weak and sick are all that I can picture. It seems like just yesterday that he was here with us. I just miss my dad. And I don't say it often enough. I miss my dad.
i do that too.. as much as i wasn't to remember the good times sometimes his sickest moments just wont go away... i recently read another blog that looked at ptsd as a part of grief... made a whole lot of sense..
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