Last night I was really sad. I told McKenna that she was going to go stay with grandma and papa (Jason's parents) next week. McKenna's face lit up and she very excitedly started to say - "my papa! my papa!" Then she said "Papa wake up". So I realized she was talking about my dad. She thought she was going to get to go by him next week. It makes me realize that she does miss him, and how excited she would be to see him again. Whenever we would go visit my dad, he would open his arms and she would run full speed and jump into his arms for a big hug. I'm sad I will never see that again.

I tried to explain to McKenna that papa isn't just sleeping. Especially since the funeral director told me not to tell her he was sleeping. But she doesn't get it. I tell he is up in Heaven, but she doesn't know what that means either. I wish life was so simple for me sometimes to not have to know what death and heaven is.